Major Life Change

Aug 1, 2018

Dear Noah and Dylan,

   Some interesting updates to report, and neither of which will you ever need a reminder about such as this blog, but I will add a few details you might forget down the road. First of all, Adam moved out! Apparently, your mom filed for divorce. You both know a lot more than either me or your dad, but your mom did talk to your dad and tell him that he is out. Both of us are relieved as we've worried about his violent nature, his obsession with guns at least from what it appears to be on Facebook, hateful attitude in general towards liberals, pro-Trump propaganda and worst of all, his lack of any identifying photos of himself as your step-dad. HIs profile picture has been just of him, or him and his first daughter, Kelsey. That has been for a long time, now. Anyway, he apparently has moved into a camper in his dad's backyard and has signed over parental rights of Emily, your seven month old sister. And the house is in your mom's name so not much he can do about that given its a short term marriage. He told your mom he wanted to start a new life. We all thought this would happen, but certainly a lot sooner than five years, and not after having a little baby.
    I asked each of you separately how you felt about Adam moving out. We were together at Mass General since i was having a paracentesis done (draining fluid from my abdomen caused by a return of the cancer.) Noah said he wasn't upset, that things were quieter without Kelsey, and Dylan said he was never one of his favorites. Sounds like your mom is happy and relieved after initial coping with rejection, but it does sound very mutual. She said he went on a month long boat trip, came back and told her he wanted out.
    The other interesting update is that your mom invited your dad to come by for a cookout over the weekend..and your dad went! He stayed for several hours, mostly playing in the pool with you both and the other kids there, your cousins from Arizona and Uncle Bill's kids. Sounds like you had a great week with them visiting. Your dad even gave your mom a half-hug when he left when she was washing dishes. She was probably taken aback, and didn't react much. I am so proud of your dad since he was really in a quandary as to whether or not he should show up. Didn't know if he would feel weird, like an outsider and not really welcome. I told him if he didn't go, he would probably feel the same way, so why not go. I knew you guys would be thrilled to see him and it would be such a good step in the peace process between your mom and dad which would make life easier on everyone, especially the two of you.
    Noah, I guess you weren't as excited to see him, or maybe you felt awkward with the two worlds crossing borders, but Dylan your dad said you were beaming and took him all around his room to show him books that you had read, even one that your dad read to you. Your dad got so emotional on the phone telling me about it that he started crying. He loves you both so much and never ever wanted to be separated from you because of divorce or any reason. He may have a hard time letting you two grow up and move on! Dylan, watch out or you might end up being his roommate and recreating the TV show "Sanford and Son!" LOL! But Noah, I know you do adore your dad and I see your being much more affectionate to him recently which has been great to see. There is no doubt that you are more bonded with your mom, and probably Dylan too since as humans, we don't let anything get between us and our mothers! there is no stronger bond! And I'm happy that she has been such a good mother to you!
    I was hoping to see you guys up at the cottage we rented on Rangely Lake next to Auntie Susan and Richard but it turns out your dad can't fit it in. He will be in N.Conway the first weekend until Tuesday and then has to see a surgeon on Friday for a consult on polyps on his bladder. He is of course a nervous wreck about that. I am disappointed since I figured we could take you out on Auntie Susan's pontoon boat and float on the lake.  I haven't seen too much of you guys this summer. We did have a fun visit together at the hospital. Your dad gave me a ride to help Uncle Joe out since it was a work day. We played Knockout Whist in the waiting room and took bets on how many liters of fluid I had in my gut. Turned out there were almost 3. I was the closest guess. I even had my oncology nurse take a guess at it. The technicians got a kick out of it. The previous week there were 5.2 liters! I was in rough shape. Had to start chemo again the following week, otherwise the fluid would continue to build up. there are a few small cancerous nodules of a couple centimeters in size, but that is enough to irritate the lining of the abdomen and cause that fluid. It really sucks! But after getting through chemo  one of six planned, i feel better. (the first week is kind of yucky, digestion issues, lack of appetite, but that passes) It sucks that the cancer is back again for the 3rd time. I hope to be around for a few more years and see you both graduate from High School, maybe even get married, have kids, or be able to follow what you end up doing with your lives as you become adults. I hope I will have had some influence on you being your favorite aunt (right?) and that you will make me proud no matter where I am, watching from "the moon", or from here on Earth.
     Looking forward to a long weekend together in October in Stowe, Vt to celebrate my turning 60. As I told Dylan when he was making fun of me almost being 60, it's better than not turning 60!
Love you not so little rascals,
Auntie Kim